I was born in Berlin, as my father, who was a soldier, was stationed there. I was hatched on the 20th of May 1974, in a military hospital, giving me full British status. Apparently, when I was born i was very hairy, like an ape...shame I wasn't as bright! I was born with an older sister (Clair), who was born the year before and got there first...lol

My childhood...ah the memories....AAAAAAA!!!
Due to my fathers job, we moved around alot. My earliest memories are of living in Belgium, at SHAPE, this is where my younger sister was born, in 1979. I went to a French speaking Primary school there, and learnt to speak French fluently. Sadly, the only French I know now is "mange la merde"...lol.

More happy education...lol
Around 1980 we moved to Northern Ireland for the second time (I was 1 year old the first time), to a place called Lisburn. All I really remember about Ireland is being good at school, and naughty out of school. This probably had some connection to the fact that they still had corporal punishment in Irish schools, so I did all of my naughtiness in my free time.

Auslander...

In 1981 we all moved to Herford in West Germany (as it was then). My favorite memories of here are the beautiful scenery, deep snow in the winter and hot summers. I went to my first secondary school while we lived here, called Prince Rupert School, in Rinteln (which is near Hameln, you know, the pied piper and all that stuff...lol). All I remember about these times is that the older kids were into Iron Maiden, and bullied us alot. Excellent snow in the winter here too.

A brief visit to the
Luneburger Heide...

At some stage (2nd year I think) we moved to Soltau, in the North East. The town we lived in had its own amusement park on the out-skirts. I went to a school on Hohne called Gloucester School. I don't remember alot about it, we only lived there for 6 months, because my father got a long awaited promotion.

And then to the
industrial areas...
A move to the Krefeld area was next, first to a village outside called St.Tonis, then into Krefeld itself. I liked this area the most. The 1st school I went to was Dalton Middle School, near Dusseldorf. I then went on to Windsor School in Rheindahlen, a very large secondary school. We had 300+ in our year alone, 1000+in the school. I went here for a while, but had to change schools again, as my father was due to be posted again during my exam years...so I was shipped off to a boarding school...

Imperial Prison 14,3 Electric Fences...(our postal code was IP14 3EF....lol)
...aahhh...the school that makes me glad to be an adult now. St.Georges School, Gt.Finborough near Stowmarket (UK), I still cringe when I think of it. I went here for just over 2 years, and the life I had was too miserable to comunicate in a sane way. Lets just say I was glad to leave there...although it was only just by choice, well more of a unanimous decision between me and the school. They were kind enough to let me sit my exams first though... During my sentence here the family moved again...

Willich...the home of
Hannen Alt
Willich is a village, close to Krefeld, with enough pubs to keep the population of a small city drunk. My family moved here while I was at school and, although I visited in the holidays, I didn't really get to know it until I returned for good. After my exams it was decided that I would return to Windsor School and do A-levels. My chosen subjects were Maths and Physics.
This turned out to be the last thing on my mind once I was there, because I joined a Heavy Metal band as one of the guitar players (played guitar since I was 9yrs old), and this was the only thing to occupy my mind...

"You don't HAVE to be
here,you know...?"
So... I didn't do my home-work, didn't concentrate in lessons, and generaly wasted everyones time. All I could think about was the band and improving my guitar skills. This, obviously, did not go down well... and I was called into the head-of-years' office and told, "You don't have to be here if you don't want to be. A-levels are something you CHOOSE to do. If you aren't interested in being here, then you could always leave and get a job."

And so, I did...

Work
And since that day I have done over 30 jobs, including...
Factory jobs
I've made ladders, picture frames, air-conditioning units, cables, transformers, and more.
Cleaning jobs
I've cleaned a flour mill, a potato processing building, a sash-window factory, the inside of tankers, engineering workshops, houses and more.
Hospitality
I've worked in pubs, restaurants, a cafe, brasserie/function rooms/resaurant at a golf course, a members club, a night-club and more, holding positions as high as manager/licencee.
Security
I've guarded static sites, responded to alarm call-outs, patrolled/locked up sites and more.